While on our 2nd outing to our cottage this spring (2001), More
This corner of MoreLife will house my frequent (sometimes infrequent) reflections on various aspects of my life with Paul (Tom) - an individual unique from all others, I realized when I came to know him personally in December 1999.
2/2/12
"Huh?!"
That was my immediate response when I saw a Facebook notice on my computer screen the afternoon of Jan 31 2012 saying that "unauthorized material" had been removed from my Facebook page. It didn't take me more than a few seconds to conclude that my 39 year old son, Andrew Raastad (legally Edward Andreas Raastad, childhood nickname Andy) or his wife Laura Haddan Raastad, had registered a complaint that I had photographs of their infant son, my grandson, Connor Matthew Raastad on my Photo page. Sure enough! The photo album named "Kitty's Favorite People", containing 3 photographs of 4 that had been emailed to me, was gone. More
3/29/10
Have you ever found yourself in a written (or verbal) misunderstanding with another person and, despite your repeated attempts to unsnarl the tangle, the other person continues to misinterpret a portion of an original statement and/or action with additional misinterpretation of follow-up contacts? More
4/24/09
After the last entry in the exchange to follow I sat at my computer and thought about what it was saying about the individual who made it, a blogger who refers to himself as Paleo Pat .... More inserted 4/1/10
3/5/09
I and Paul had a really great time high energy dancing last night (3/4/2009) at Switch Wednesdays held weekly at PCL (Pussy Cat Lounge) in Scottsdale Arizona - the music was more upbeat and energetic than some other Wednesdays have been. One episode, though, raised concern for me after Paul related it to me about 1-1/4 hrs into our 2+ hours of non-stop dancing. More
2/26/08
I thought it quite appropriate to make my little corner of MoreLife.org available to Paul to record whatever he thought worth writing on this his 70th birthday. So for this entry, the words are those of Paul Wakfer - my love, my husband, my partner in all, and now my Super Septuagenarian ;>) ... **Kitty More
10/15/07
An indirect question was raised by a MoreLife Yahoo poster wondering whether I, Paul or other readers rarely, if ever, notice effects from supplements, as he had found to be the case for himself. My answer, as I composed it, quickly became long and descriptive, something I thought more appropriate to Kitty Reflects. More
12/04/06
Awesome! That's what it was. I haven't used that word to describe a concert before, but Alan Parsons Live in Santa Barbara's Arlington Theatre last night (12/3/2006) was just that. And well worth the $126 I paid total for the 2 tickets plus the monetary and physical cost of the 13.5 hours, 1040 miles roundtrip drive it took to be there. Awesome indeed! More
10/05/06
A recent email discussion Paul had with Oli (Olafur Pall Olafsson, co-moderator with us at MoreLife Yahoo) included me, mostly because I'd added some information for Oli while reviewing Paul's reply (something we often do for each other). But the last few exchanges included specific reference to me, to something I had not done, Paul's thoughts on that and then Oli's too. I waited a few days before responding, partly to consider once again the implications of my non-action. Upon finishing my reply I decided that the exchange warranted being made public. Maybe some others will profit by the learning over many years I have gained about myself and the growing of close personal relationships .... More
9/17/06
I wrote most of what follows on a yellow paper tablet soon after returning to Ontario in 2006 from Arizona for the warmer months (end of April to end of October). I put it aside without completing it, at the point marked ~~, because I didn't have a resolution or conclusion to verbalize. I came upon an item last week that has helped me finish ...... More
4/8/05
I had a little bit of time yesterday when I was getting my hair tinted - yes, I do chemically enhance myself by covering my grey with a lighter brown than my hair originally was many years ago. (I'm one of those unfortunate person's whose hair color genes began to "turn off" at age 16.) But anyway, I used the time while there to jot down some of my thoughts - the day after my 60th birtday. More
3/11/05
Just last night I shared with 3 other people in 2 separate emails my thoughts about the place of Paul Wakfer in my life. Today I decided that I would like everyone to know them. Here is what I wrote: More
1/18/05
Paul and I made our initial return to the two dance clubs in Arizona we've been frequenting the week after we arrived from Toronto. (See previous entry for the trip details.) We knew that "Flux" on Saturdays was still a regular event since plugs for it were sprinkled throughout the KNRJ Energy Arizona [10/08: no longer this genre] commercial breaks. To be sure that Heart-Five on Congress in Tucson still played house music on Wednesdays - or even still existed, I checked its website and found it updated and reassuring. So we were "on" for both nights - and ready to go. More
1/11/05
Everything was going well on that Wednesday morning, January 5, 2005, as 6am rolled around. Paul took the cooler chest down to the car in the underground garage of our Toronto apartment and I accompanied him carrying smaller items and opening the doors (the elevator does not go down to that level). We were well organized, giving ourselves plenty of time on Tuesday to do all the packing and transferring computer files from Paul's machine to the laptop. I had made a list of things to do and checked off items as they were completed; we had sufficient time to review things that we might need.Getting up at 3:00am had not been difficult since we'd arranged our sleeping schedule with that early arising in mind. Packing the cold food and getting everything down to the car went beautifully - Paul did a beautiful job as usual organizing the car even with the additional items we were taking south. So at 6:30am we were pulling out of the garage only a half-hour later than our goal. The drive down to Arizona for our winter stay was off to a great start, despite the fact that snow was lightly falling. More
5/28/04
Paul and I do not just write from an ivory tower, making statements about either physiology or philosophy that have no practical value. Neither do we make suggestions or offer opinions based on those scientific principles and/or fundamental ideas that we do not ourselves practice where applicable. As a real personal example to illustrate the kind of disclosure to which I refer to in my Anonymity essay at the Self-Sovereign Individual Project, I'm providing here the type of information that many would limit to only a few, even though that concealment will likely prevent them from attaining a much desired objective. However, the major reason for this disclosure is to increase the likelihood of success in a search, rather than its value as an illustrative example. More
10/31/03
October 31, 2003
Dear Aunt Wanda,
It's now been well over 6 months since Paul and I saw you in Arizona before you shipped your possessions and yourself to Poland. Although I haven't heard anything from you, I do truly hope that you have been well, enjoying your time with friends and family, and that the quieter atmosphere in Poland is still meeting with your pleasure. ....
I'm writing to you now after a very different month for me - and Paul. More
9/27/03
**********
11/8: I wrote the first part below on 9/27/03 as the contents of a card sent to my sister Mary 2 days after the early return from her home in the UK following the events I write about below. The second was the message in a belated e-birthday card sent to my youngest brother, Chris, with whom I'd had no communication for several years. The final is a message I started with intentions of sending to my former husband; unfortunately he has gained little understanding of me or himself in the 4 years following the dissolution of our 31 years of marriage - though I did share some similar thoughts in a much later email prompted by his detailed description of my earlier episodes (from his perspective) in response to Paul's request while I was "in the throes". **Kitty More
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8/31/03 inserted 1/8/04
I'm taking a break from a rather frustrating and sad task - creating an HTML version of the email and WORD dialogue between Paul and George H Smith. What had started with high hopes and expectations in just over one week turned into a grave disappointment. More
8/27/03
Our latest trip to Arizona is over and ended on several good notes. A late summer trip to our house in Arizona was needed to insure that everything was going well with only a watchful eye by our neighbor Bonnie on the automatic watering system and also to receive a periodic order of supplements. We crossed the border both ways again without incident and though we spent much of the first day on the return trip not talking to each other, all was greatly understood by both of us on the remaining 6 hour leg from Benton Harbor MI to Toronto the last day. More
7/13/03
Paul has really been "into his own", as some would put it, for the last 3 months. He's never so happy as when he is solving an important fundamental problem. More
3/22/03
Discouragement is a fairly recurrent companion these past several weeks for me - Paul too, but not always at the same time or over the same things. More
2/25/03
"How are things going?" I was asked. Well, that depends on how one adds up the ledger - what weighting is given to the events of the past several weeks. More
1/29/03
Life is almost "normal" again - the AZ version of normal life, that is. More
1/19/03
Paul and I delayed departure from Toronto 1 day since the last MoreLife update took longer than expected. Once the upload was complete, our attention turned to packing our clothing and food for the drive to my house in Arizona. At approximately 11:00am Wednesday 1/8/03, with our new WRX wagon expertly packed (Paul's doings, not mine), we were off. I thought I'd be writing here about our trip and the first few days of settling in, but much to our surprise, the events beginning the evening of Saturday 1/11 at about 9:00pm far overshadowed everything preceding since leaving Toronto. More
12/31/02
Yes, it's been a very good year, this 2002 that's in its last hour as I write this. More
12/9/02
Last week brought a pleasant surprise for Paul and me. We discovered that instead of being forgotten after almost a 3 month absence at our old Wednesday dancing haunt here in Toronto, we were welcomed resoundingly by numerous staff asking where we'd been and having our coats given royal "behind the bar" treatment. More
11/27/02
Well, I didn't get the flu and Paul (Tom) has recovered from it - and then whatever it was that plagued him for several more days creating terrible urticaria, mostly on his arms. That episode and the past 2 days of dread at dealing with a required border crossing were quite taxing on my nerves. But now both are over and the relief is significant. More
11/14/02
Even "professional" life-extensionists get sick occasionally. I've had periodic sinus problems (beginning about 6 years ago that continued even after joining Tom (Paul)) for which I sometimes resort to nasal irrigation and once in the past 2 years degenerated into a mild sinus infection. (I did have much worse ones in years past.) For Tom (Paul), "getting sick" is more than for most people, a difficult situation, since to some extent he thinks that it just shouldn't happen - to him. More
11/7/02
Mixed marriages in the racial sense are not uncommon in today's societies of North America and even Europe, although 50 years ago they were actually illegal in many places in the US. While no one will find a law or regulation that explicitly states that a US citizen and resident can not marry a Canadian citizen and resident, our last experience at the border crossing into Canada tells Tom (Paul) and me that immigration agents are allowed to limit, and possibly forbid, visits based on such a false presumption. More
11/6/02
The past week I've had more time to write my thoughts on a number of subjects then was available for several months previously. This is because I've not had a fully functional computer to use. During this time Tom (Paul) and I have returned to Toronto after which he spent the majority of his time configuring our network to include a new notebook computer which was still in a problem state that was unresolved at the end of our month stay in Arizona. More
11/5/02
I have two best friends - one is my husband and partner, Tom (Paul) and the other is a man I've known 21 years since the days when we studied engineering together - Greg. They both have many characteristics in common, otherwise I could not treasure them both so highly. I have learned from both of them much about myself as well as how to be a better friend and helpmate to each of them. More
11/3/02
Most people who are familiar with Tom Matthews would be surprised to learn that biochemistry, even as it relates to anti-aging, is not his primary intellectual interest. Despite the fact that he has spent the major portions of the past 10 years studying and applying his skills in the general field of life-extension, he would rather be doing something else - delving deeply into the foundations of physics, mathematics, and philosophy. More
11/2/02
Visiting old haunts can be an interesting experience, a sort of time travel adventure. Doing so with someone with whom is shared a great emotional tie can greatly increase the significance of that adventure by the verbal communication that takes place. Tom (Paul) and I took a trip back into my past on Labor Day 2002. More
8/14/02
A major part of our plans for visiting Switzerland, Austria and northern Italy included a number of good eating experiences. Although we are calorie restriction practioners, we enjoy good tasting food, especially various ethnic dishes. While Tom (Paul) and I did enjoy a few good restaurant meals, most of our meals were either at hostels or were comprised of what we purchased locally. Still we were surprised - and disappointed - that the apparent eating habits of many in these areas are not much different from the Standard American Diet (SAD). More
8/13/02
While Tom (Paul) is definitely not a passive driver - he would never own nor rent an automatic - he is also not aggressive. He is, though, assertive, taking pleasure in driving his old (but not aged) low slung Acura Integra at fast, but safe, speeds for the conditions of road and traffic. However, Italian drivers, at least in the parts of northern Italy we saw a few weeks ago, seem to have only 2 gears in their cars - fast and faster. More
8/6/02
Tom (Paul) and I really enjoyed our return to dancing in the Cathedral at The Joker last Friday night since we'd missed the previous 2 Fridays and had no club dancing while we were gone on our trip to Switzerland, Austria, Italy and Lichtenstein. This last was a disappointment since we'd expected to find our type of dance club in at least Zurich and Milan as we had in Blackburn, north of Manchester England. (Kitty Reflects on MoreLife_04/28/02) What we found instead was a lot of sitting or standing around drinking beer (or wine) either inside or out, sometimes with good music in the background but with no place to dance and no one showing any interest in doing so. More
7/21/02
Although our trip, mainly for the Sixth International Symposium on Neurobiology and Neuroendocrinology of Aging in Bregenz Austria, had a less than wonderful start - due to unpleasant family matters for Tom, numerous business items to be addressed, and several days of hot humid weather in our non-airconditioned apartment - the first day ended on a positive note. More
5/01/02
Our stay in North Wales could have been better. Lack of sufficient sleep for several days had left me a prime target for a sinus infection. (My sinuses have been troublesome for the past 5 years but I'd not had an infection for over a year.) The Snowden Ranger Hostel in Rhyd Ddu, Snowdonia National Park, had a strict lock-out policy from 10AM to 5PM, even for those with private rooms. Lastly, if it wasn't actually raining, the mists were heavy enough that nothing completely dried in Wales while we were there. More
4/28/02
Tom and I managed to get to 3 dance clubs while we were in England, though it wasn't quite as we originally planned. But then much of our trip wasn't as we had planned. More
4/26/02
I didn't think before our departure that England would be terribly foreign - they do speak English there, even if they do drive on the wrong side of the road. However, I was very wrong - it's another planet where the inhabitants also happen to be humanoid and use some words which appear to be familiar. More
4/25/02
I can't say that our England/Wales vacation was a disaster. Mary and Graham's wedding was lovely - everything to my sister's well constructed plan. So much of the rest of the 9 days and 8 nights , however, was negative that on a scale of 1 to 10, I rate it a 6.5. Just shortly before the return departure, however, I would have scored it lower; but Tom and I are once again talking to each other. More
4/8/02
Sunday April 7 marked the end of an era in Tom's life. His faithful canine companion of 6 years, Moose, died after a sudden deterioration during the night. He would have been 12 years old sometime this month. More
3/28/02
I learned first hand over the past 2 weeks how beneficial puzzle solving is for Tom and how good he is at it. More
1/29/02
The first 2 weeks after Tom's abrupt removal as Moderator for The LEF Forums were not easy ones for him, or for me. Although we had discussed it many months ago - the idea of being independent of LEF and all that would entail - one aspect of the actual break did not occur to me, if it did in deed occur to Tom. More
1/10/02
A week from now will be Tom's last planned day as moderator of the LEF forums. It will seem strange to me - and many others - after that, not to see his [ --Tom] comments with most messages posted. (Of course, unless LEF management deletes all previous threads, his comments - typically filled with peer reviewed citations and/or his own insight - will remain available.) Now, however, he works feverishly to meet his paid moderator obligations, increase his presence on sci.life-extension, while we gear up for increased work on MoreLife. More
1/3/02
Last New Year's Eve, Tom and I spent the evening with a few friends at our apartment in Toronto. The dance clubs we frequented would be more crowded noisy, and smokey making dancing less than enjoyable - so we danced at home. This year, however, we decided to ring out the old by ourselves at the cottage. More
12/21/01
This past weekend marked the most significant anniversary for Tom and me. It was 2 years ago at this time that we each determined - virtually simultaneously - that we were in love. What brings an understanding smile to our lips, is that this occurred with 2000 miles between us and with only 1 telephone conversation and numerous email exchanges. More
12/19/01
This cottage get-away was a collection of small pleasures, problems, and ponderings. It was also the latest in the year that we have yet spent time at the cottage, which in fact, made these "p's" possible. More
11/22/01
An adventuresome spirit does not require that one climb mountains, jump from planes, or traverse barren deserts on camelback. Tom and I explore the lesser "traveled" areas of interest without adding known risk to our goal of a greatly extended healthy life. These most often take the form of walking (or driving to, if at a distance) locales new to at least me (frequently also possessing fond memories for Tom) and trying new foods or recipes at home or in restaurants. More
11/21/01
Not many of us have the resources or the opportunity to break new trails. However, most of us can discover once lost paths or those underused but deserving of travel. That's exactly what Tom and I did this past weekend at the cottage. More
10/25/01
Periodic stressful events for many of us typically include being caught in traffic congestions, disagreement with loved ones, and failing to meet work schedules, among others. The owners of a cottage or cabin in northern temperate zones have another - preparing the getaway residence for below freezing weather. More
10/23/01
This past weekend at the cottage was planned to enjoy the de-leafed forest and turn off the water for the winter season. Our activities included both of these and an added event that took Tom back 30 years in memories. More
10/8/01
While our two favorite dance clubs are quite different, there are considerable similarities in the young people who frequent both of them. Many of the behaviors are negative - even bothersome - but some are encouraging. More
9/20/01
Many thoughts have gone through my mind these past 9 days; a very large number centered on events in New York City, Washington DC, and a county SE of Pittsburgh on the morning of 9/11/01. Tom and I, like many others I'm sure, spent hours watching video reruns, reading numerous online reports, and discussing the most horrible terrorist attacks to have occurred anywhere. I suspect, however, that we probably asked questions that many others did not. More
9/06/01
A few days away at the cottage can do wonders for my (our) sense of well being. The trip preparations for this last one had been going quite well, although 4 hours late - I'd remembered to use my developed checklist and only 1 item remained. Tom was working on the last Forum post so I didn't want to interrupt him to ask if the group of Science News biweekly periodicals I'd located in one of the several piles on the side table were those still to be read. More
8/25/01
This past week I took on a role that was new for me, requiring knowledge that was among Tom's several areas of expertise, but not mine. I intently studied the subject matter for days while Tom feverishly coached me as he worked on a highly pertinent e-mail (and maintained The Forums). But I knew that I had to appear without him. More
8/16/01
"Do the ends justify the means?" I was asked this in an e-mail by someone trying to justify to himself the unethical actions of another while in pursuit of "great science".
My answer was a definite NO. More
8/2/01
Somewhere back in May when I started the glossary for MoreLife, I thought the whole job would only take a few months and come the end of summer it would be complete and online. Boy was I naive - both as to the coding problems I would encounter and the content convolutions and controversies that would arise. Regarding this last, I have found myself "taking a course" in Philosophy of Life Extension 101. More
7/26/01
Summer in the city this year has had plenty of ups and downs for Tom. My presence has provided the loving companionship he missed for 35 years but at the same time it brought concerns for him that he wasn't meeting my needs - thermally speaking. More
7/25/01
Answering people's life-extension questions is occasionally difficult for Tom. This occurs when the poster to The Forums or newsgroup is seeking a solution to a serious health problem that likely could have been prevented, or at least minimized, if addressed much earlier. More
7/13/01
This past visit to the cottage was a "Moose Spa" - dedicated to the much needed grooming of our ever faithful but increasingly "fragrant" canine.
It was my second visit to Tom in February last year, I recall, that I casually commented that his car smelled strongly of dog - without a doubt, it stank! More
6/28/01
Many of our cottage tasks have displayed a great resemblance to an onion or those beautifully carved nested Russian eggs. The deceptive feature of this type task is that it appears so simple...just take an area rug from our apartment and unroll it with its padding in the den, used as a bedroom by granddaughter Lauren on her occasional visits. Tom was confident that size would not be a problem, and he was right about that. More
6/15/01
I thought I knew how to play Scrabble before I met Tom, but I learned that, like most people, I had a very limited view of that game. More
6/4/01
Tom came over to me as I scribbled the introductory words for this page on a paper notepad (no computer at the cottage) and declared "An essential secret to keeping alive is to always have more things to do." More